day 6 – (un)happy monthsary

today marks our 18th month being together.
we didnt really have a pleasant time talking to each other last night and this morning.
i am starting to get insecure again :/ it’s really not a good thing.
and i really dont like how by asking a few questions would lead us to being unhappy.
and currently our relationship is really vulnerable, we even wanted to break up.
maybe we should talk soon.

i dont know how to continue this.
i had the blog post all planned out last night, and it just doesnt seem right to type it out now.
(and i forgot most of what i planned last night. )

thank you for doing little acts like buying me sushi and the pencil case because it really means a lot to me.
thank you for being willing to spend money with/on me, cause you were such a ngiao person.
thank you for being willing to eat vegetarian food with me.
thank you for being so encouraging throughout the whole of 3.1 because it really kept me going.
thank you for being able to brush past our unhappiness.
thank you for being willing to go through this with me, taking our one last chance.

it was nice looking at old pictures and seeing how our relationship matured these 1.5 years.
had a good time trying to recall where we went and what we did for each picture 🙂
they were really good memories.
and there are so many things i still want to do with you.

i dont know how far more can our relationship go.
of course, i want it to go on for as long as possible.
but if there is really a need to let go, and if we both feel that it is better, then maybe we should.

i love you, cant wait for you to be back.


“Maybe is was never our intention to hurt one another but we just do…”

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